Dreams: Part 1

Darkness surrounds me. Nothing. Nothing but the beating of my heart and the pain that can still be felt in my body from the fire that touched it the night before. Pain. Then nothing. A flash of light, white, silver and grey. This is it! This is what I have been longing for, crying out for, asking for every day as I work, as my body burns. This is what I wanted. I smile. The pain seeps away and the wounds seem to heal as the light touches them. The blood from my many wounds dotted the white floor beneath me. Was this love, the light that I was before me?
Suddenly, a world began to form in front of me. As if I were blinded momentarily and all I could see was this white. Colors, shapes, trees began to form before me. A whole new world. Trees covered in fruit. So many different colors.
A river began to form. Perfect, flowing waters cascaded down the river and in between smooth rocks that jutted out from the bottom. Tears began to drip down my face as this world began to form before my eyes. I heard somewhere that dreams came true. My grandpa used to tell me back when I lived on the earth, oh so long ago. Compared to where I lived these last few months, the earth could have been Heaven. But even this surpassed any beauty that I had seen on earth. This had to be Heaven. This was Heaven...
I began to run through the soft, green grass below me that slowly swayed in the wind like waves. Every step, like breathing in new life. I could stay in this moment forever.
I began to pull the beautifully covered fruits off the trees, eating them one by one, biting in and letting the sweet, wonderful juice drip down my chin. There was nowhere on earth I'd rather be. Except for maybe back to the moment 16 years ago when I was just 6 years old, laying in my grandfathers arms, rocking with him in his big, blue Lazy boy rocker, listening to him tell me how good Jesus is... How much he loved me. I remembered getting goosebumps all over when he used to talk about it... I listened, but I never really did. My ears heard his words, my heart took nothing from them. And now, 16 years later, they still ring through my mind just as clear as they did the moment he told them to me. He was right... Jesus did exist. God was always with me, around me. If I could be anywhere else, it would be lying in that mans arms this very second, telling him that he was right. That dreams really did come true. That I should have listened to his every word. That I loved him.... That he was my best friend... No one else cared for me the way that he did. I fell on my side, still tasting the last bite of fruit in my mouth. I began to weep. "Jesus... God! Forgive me, Daddy. I need you... God, I hate living my life without you," I said, barely able to keep my words together between the sounds of my breathing and the flowing tears that ran uncontrollably from my eyes. "Jesus... You're everything." As I said it, the words rang out a hundred... No. A thousand times! Like beautiful music, it sounded. "Jesus, You are everything!" My voice rang out through the forest.
A sound. From far off... A song. Somebody was singing. No, not someone. A whole group of people, singing a tune and dancing as streets of gold formed before them. It was their ground. Wherever they walked, everything changed. Even became more... alive! If that was even possible. Everything here seemed to be so filled with life already. Death poked out it's ugly head out from nowhere. Not from behind a tree, not from behind a branch. Nowhere. It was all life, beauty, joy. I never ever ever wanted to leave.
A young boy with blond hair, maybe about 6 years old was wearing a tunic with a red cloth tied around his waist was singing, dancing, jumping up and down. The most beautiful voice, I thought. His voice seemed to stand out among the others. Sounded more... pure. Perfect. Beautiful. His voice send chills running down my spine. This was true beauty.
His eye caught mine as he twirled around. He stopped, looked at me for a moment, his eyes lit up. Those big, blue, beautiful eyes. He began to run toward me, off the path of gold.
"Sara," he shouted. Coming only about as high as my stomach, he reached me and threw his arms around my waist. "We have been waiting for you! Well, I have!" He smiled and looked up at me. A sparkle in his eye caught my attention. For the first time in a long time, I felt loved. I did not know this child, but somehow I did. I bent down, took him in my arms and sobbed on his little shoulder.
"I love you, Sara."
"I love you too," I said back. Why did I say it? Well, because I honestly did love this little fellow. He had shown me love for the first time in days, months... had it been years?
I lifted my face from the boys shoulder and gazed over at an old man, dressed in the same slacks and same long sleeved blue and white plaid shirt that I remembered from so long ago. Grandpa. I froze.
"Wanna go see him?" The little boy asked with a huge smile on his face.
"Yes. Yes I do," I said through tears. "Granddad..." I began to walk to him, to run to him. He spread his arms and brought me in. I wrapped my arms around him and he held me. I never wanted to let go. It was that same smell on his shirt. That same smile on his face. That same feeling that I had when he used to hold me as a little girl. I wanted to hold on forever and never let go. "You were right, granddad. You were right... Dreams really do come true." My tears staining his shirt as they had so many times before. "Why didn't I ever listen? I love you, Granddad. I love you so much."
"I love you too, Princess. I missed you."
This was Heaven. This was all I ever could have asked for. This was love...


Click here to read Part 2